I came across a quote, “Love is friendship set on fire” somewhere out in the world, and tonight it just brought this scene to mind. While just a bit of flash fiction, I think I might have to come back to this character, as she seems to have much more to say.
Some days I can forget you. Some days I can forget the fact that from the moment I saw you I knew you were going to be the greatest love story of my life.
Some days I can forget how you saved me without even knowing what you had done, picked me up and set me up on my path with your smile. You didn’t even know who or what I was and you reached out to help. That’s just what you do.
Some days I can even forget how you ripped out my heart with your smile, wrapping your arms around her. I smiled along with you as you walked down the aisle to her, steeling myself by saying to myself that this was just what was meant to be.
Some days I can forget watching the two of you, wishing that I’d spoken up before you’d made your choice. Before you’d even had a choice presented to you. Before my fear of rejection took precedence over my possible happily-ever-after.
Some days I can remember you telling me how she ruined you, made you less of a person until you couldn’t take it any longer. Some days I can forget walking, drinking, as you poured your heart out in your words. I was made mute, keeping my heart bottled up because I was just starting to heal so many years down the road.
Some days I can forget how I lied to you, saying that I once had a crush, but it was no more. The bar stool became a vise, squeezing the lies out to make myself feel better, to pad up my heart from you before you ripped it to shreds again.
Some days I can forget how the wounds seeped open in my heart as I saw the new girl on your arm. I scalded my tongue with coffee to keep the lies from becoming the truth at the worst possible moment. I tried to be happy for you, starting to repair your own heart.
Some days I can forget how I walked away, letting you live your life without me. Some days I can forget how the heart doesn’t really heal, it just puts a layer of scar tissue to help you get through the days that you can’t forget any longer.
Some days I don’t even pull out your pictures any longer.
If only one of us could be happy, I always wanted it to be you.
